Columbus Day: A “Holiday” in Review

Ah, Columbus Day…a holiday I have never had off, a holiday that makes no damn sense as to why it is in fact, a holiday. Christopher Columbus “discovered” America…despite many other cultures and people that had landed there before Columbus. The even better part is that there are OG Americans that were referred to as “Indians” because this dumbass had been looking for a quick trade route to India via going west instead of the complicated as hell going east from Spain. Columbus was not a good man and was arrogant and ignorant all somehow, at the same time. Not to mention an psychotic racist and a real lazy bastard too.

One of the first people Columbus come into contact with were the Arawak. An indigenous people of North America, who greeted these foreign people (meaning Columbus and the Spanish) with open arms and friendship. What does Columbus do? Writes this:

“It appears to me, that the people are ingenious, and would be good servants and I am of opinion that they would very readily become Christians, as they appear to have no religion.”

0_O what?…

Instead of treating these people as equals they are instead, viewed as free labor and converts. When you say, “readily become Christians” or really any inserted religion, it generally means forced unwillingly. The funny thing is that Natives have always had a “religion” by our tongue, it was referred to as spirituality and naturalism. They believed in a Gaea type being and that the world was living and speaking to them, those who use and profit from the earth and its plentiful bounty. Natives didn’t waste parts of animals they hunted because they viewed that waste as disrespect to the earth and the earths willingness to allow them to consume from it. I know, you’re thinking, “what a hippie queer tree hugger” but instead of being arrogant (as many humans are) appreciate the world for what it is, beautiful.

I love that he says they would be, “good servants” simply based on them being a different skin color and dressing differently. Again, difference apparently means damn good service. How the hell can you just show up somewhere and come to the conclusion that instead of becoming allies and trading goods with these new people that instead, we should enslave them, rape them and their land and finally forcibly convert them religiously, cause they will totally want it the godless heathens!

Not to add insult to injury, but as an explorer Columbus was an abysmal failure that cost Spain a ton of money and returned nothing really. Spain was uninterested in colonizing the east coast of America (would YOU willingly live in New Jersey? Hell no) as they were interested in establishing a faster trade route to India and Asia as the plan originally was. That doesn’t mean they didn’t ransack, rape and pillage the Central Americas for gold and resources. Columbus was appointed “governor” of the “Indies” for a time, but after many accusations of tyranny, corruption and torture (most were true) he was brought before the Crown and was in jail for 6 weeks until being released and given another voyage, but was not restored as governor.
Before Columbus died he wrote 2 books, the “Book of Privileges” and the “Book of Prophecies” both of which, were insane writings. The “Book of Privileges” detailed what entitlements he and his heirs deserved from the Spanish Crown, while the “Book of Prophecies” used Bible passages to show the significance of his actions according to God apparently.

So Christopher Columbus, a wealthy but failed in the long run explorer founded our country on what? Slavery, racism, ignorance, stupidity, intolerance and immorality. So please stop acting like Columbus was some sort of hero or great human throughout history, he was no more than a self absorbed, want to be famous douche that is no different than a reality star who just won’t get it and f–k off. Instead of acting like we’re innocent from past to present maybe we should understand and accept the bastard that Columbus was…ohhh and that originally our country was “found” (God forbid we give Native Americans credit with FINDING America…) by a Viking named Leif Ericson…so Happy Leif Ericson Day!!!

Party on Leif

One comment on “Columbus Day: A “Holiday” in Review

  1. Thanks for this post. I certainly agree with what you’re saying. I have been talking about this topic a great deal lately with my mother so hopefully this will get him to see my point of view. Fingers crossed!

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